YOUR WORLD SHALL END MORTALS....*cough* I mean uh.....What's....Up....Yo....?

Greetings mortals, you have been privileged with
the presence of I, the ruler of all! Fear and tremble at my...wait....you
can't really feel my presence through the internet can you....well then....I am
kind of at a loss for words. Time for Plan B....

Hello there male and/or female of your respectable
race. I am here to send warm greetings and in no way am here to slowly
enslave and/or destroy your civilization to make way for the progress of my
people (or a space highway...whichever is more important at the time). If
you would be so kind I would appreciate all of you submitting to the will of
your galactic rulers, who may or may not make their presence known to you on
the off chance they decide to destroy this tiny, insignificant world. I
am in no way meant to be seen as a herald of doom and destruction, I am just
like you, a normal (insert name of race here) being and to think and different
is a foolish notion. I am happy to be a member of this primitive
information hub your species calls the 'Internet' and hope that I can learn
many secrets about the human race while here. But be assured I will in no
way be searching for ways in which to undermine and collapse your society to
lead to your worlds ruin. Thank you all for taking your time, which was
already useless anyway in the eyes of your galactic rulers, to read through
this obviously normal and in no way suspicious introduction.

Sincerely,

An obvious member of your species.

Good to see you finally signed up buddy. Nice to have you around.

Thanx for the invite bro, my bad it took so long to sign up here. Maybe I should stop drinking so much on the weekend *cough* that will never happen.

Lol welcome to the site bro.
BTW i want what you are drinking

hello

LMAO Love the intro

Hey Now I have added a little present for the community.....Can you spot it......Look forward to your Ninja. I know when you not drunk you can make some good designs.

Interesting introduction, pleased to meet you (in an odd sort of sense )

Welcome to planet earth... I think your work here is done. My species seems to be doing a fine job of destroying it self.